by nan
(Prineville, or.)

Question: I am 63 yr/woman, raising 4 kids - do not have time/energy/place to relax. Live in COLD country - raised in WARM country. I'm ANGRY, FRUSTRATED, STRESSED, TIRED, NO INSURANCE, STUCK!!!!!!! How to deal with this??? What would you suggest.

Answer: I can imagine you must be feeling very stressed. It is hard to cope when you are stretched to your limit and feel like you're out of options. The best advice I can give you is to try to decrease some of the pressure by trying some of these stress-busters:

1) Get support - It is impossible to do everything alone, and it sounds like you are facing a number of demands and pressures. Help from others can relieve stress as you share the load with people who can help. Possible sources of support may include Church groups, peer support networks, newcomer's clubs, woman's groups, cultural associations, etc. Support may include hands-on help (for example, taking turns watching kids, or cooking a meal together) or emotional support.

2) Take care of yourself - Do one little thing each day that makes you feel good. Is there a kind of music that helps lift your mood? Play that music while you do a chore to help make the task more enjoyable. Do you have a favorite outfit? Dress up, even just to do chores around the house. Find small ways like these to treat yourself.

3) Use quick relaxation techniques a few times each day. Keep relaxation sessions short (5 minutes or less) so relaxation does not become one more task to fit into an already busy schedule. For example, stop what you are doing to take a 3-minute stretching break, do 1 minute of deep breathing, or a 2-minute progressive muscle relaxation exercise.

I hope that you are able to experience some relief soon.


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